When The Party’s Over: My Journey With Sobriety

May 9, 2017 – the day I decided to take a 30-day break from alcohol to see if it’d help with my mysterious health issues and dwindling mental health. Almost 8 years later, I never picked up a drink again.

When I first made the decision, it was nearly impossible to imagine how I could stay loyal to this lifestyle change and simultaneously live life and do the things I desired without feeling depleted or deprived in social situations. This thought told me one thing: if I thought the absence of alcohol would change my life so drastically, maybe the presence of alcohol for the last 15 years of my life was more of an issue that I wanted to admit.

You never really think about how many social events revolve around having drinks until you stop drinking. Happy? Celebratory drink. Stressed out? Drink to relax. Dinner party with friends? Glass of wine. Baseball game? Ice cold beer. It’s everywhere and when you suddenly stop joining in, you get questioned. Pregnant? Sick? Party pooper? No one gets it because why would you not at least have one drink with your friends? The simple answer is for some people, one drink it’s always that easy. For some people, it’s never just one.

When alcohol got to a point where it didn’t make me feel good anymore and the potential for it to lead to choices that negatively affected my health increased, it very obviously became not worth it.

Once I got more comfortable with my stance on alcohol, I changed the direction of the conversations I’d find myself in and I stopped making excuses as to why I wasn’t drinking. Instead of “I can’t drink,” it became “I don’t drink.” There was no need for a justification because I simply don’t owe anyone an explanation. I was doing this for me.

I was ready to take control of something that had always had so much control over me. I had the power to choose what I put in my body, and in my quest for wellness, booze just didn’t make the cut. 

I’ve learned many things about myself these last 8 years. For one, I have more will-power than I thought I had. At times, I’ve had to pull it from the depths of my soul, but I haven’t waivered in what I felt was best for me and my health. I also have stopped caring what others think of my choice and truly realize the snarky comments or backhanded compliment usually have nothing to do with me and everything to do with someone else’s internal conflicts. If it bothers YOU I don’t drink, it is not MY problem. This might sound harsh, but it took a couple of years to understand the people my sobriety will bother the most, are the people who are also struggling like I did.

Don’t let society and the social norms make you second guess any decision that will better you, your health, or your personal growth. Whatever you feel in your heart, go after it. Don’t care what people think because someone will ALWAYS have an opinion. 

When you no longer have a substance to run to in times of stress, joy, or any of the many emotions life throws at you, you learn to face your demons head on and deal with life. I’ve had some dark days and some amazing days, but what I take comfort in is I have control over myself, what I eat, drink, and what I do. And that is pretty damn empowering.  

If you find yourself sober-curious, I urge you to sit down and make a list of WHY alcohol is in your life. Your likes and dislikes with how it affects you and your actions. If something stands out, explore it with yourself, your friends/family, or a trusted professional.

At the end of the day, one thing I always come back to, especially on the hard days, is we all get ONE BODY AND ONE LIFE. No one is making it out of this world alive, so if all we can do is stay true to what we really desire in this short life, then we can never go wrong. What will you do with your one opportunity? Write that down, look at it often, and pursue it wholeheartedly. 🖤

As always, cheering you on.

If this blog helped, make sure to follow @xomandyscott for more small business tips, advice, and encouragement along your journey. 🖤